Ever wonder what the root cause of criticism is? Why is it that only certain people criticize you, or why there are only certain people that you criticize? How about the effects of criticism on your life, the life of others, and the life between the criticizer and God?
Criticism is defined as the act of expressing disapproval and of noting the problems or faults of a person or thing: the act of criticizing someone or something. Criticism can be deserved or undeserved, positive or negative, the building up or the tearing down, gossip, direct, or indirect. Either way criticism comes about; there is always an underlying factor, other than the person or thing that presents a fault, which is the real reason for the critical attitude. Some reasons may include to encourage or motivate others, to feel superior than others, to manipulate others to gain control where one perceives that control may be lost, a persons mood triggered by some other threat, disappointment, or hormone change in which they use another individual as the target to blow off steam, to limit or damage another's reputation due to envy or resentment, a lack in skills in knowing how to communicate an unmet need, unforgiveness of past or present hurts or disappointments, impatience, the list can go on. However, one key factor that remains consistent about criticism is that God views it as sin. Why? Because criticism rarely has anything to do with another person's fault; but instead, the decision to possess a negative attitude because someone else's fault is different than ones own personal fault. The Lord has said in Romans 3:23 that all have fallen short of His glory. There isn't one person alive or deceased from the past or present that hasn't had some type of fault of their own; the reason why Christ came to atone our shortcomings. God's original design of man was perfection and without fault; we are created in His image. Yet, the desire to go against God's moral law was found as the ultimate fall within man's heart, being the gateway to many transgressions. Unlike God, who is able to see all man's faults because He is holy; man can only perceive the faults of others, which often are not faults at all, but a shortcoming within the criticizer themselves.
God commands that we be slow at finding faults in others, while being quick at giving grace through forgiveness towards those who offend us. Choosing to criticize in His eyesight makes one guilty of one of His seven sins that He detests and views as an abomination, "Feet that race to sow discord amongst his brothers" (Proverbs 6:19). When Aaron and Miriam made the mistake of criticizing their brother Moses; God came down in a cloud to defend Moses, and afflicted Miriam with leprosy (Numbers 12). The root cause of criticism can stem from unforgiveness, a need to self exalt, bitterness, envy, resentment, careless words from an unbridled tongue, or a need to control and gain something. In the beginning, I did mention that criticism can be positive or deserved... from that viewpoint ... criticism can sometimes be what is called; constructive criticism, in which words are chosen carefully, and without malice, to bring about a positive result, in regards to someone else's weakness, to bring about strength. For example, maybe you have a partner that is an excessive spender, and doesn't manage their finances too well; there you will find room to criticize, especially if the money that he or she spends is joint. In this case, criticism is not only deserved, but can bring about the possibility of a more positive outcome in the future. God would expect from you to address the situation because He has said where there is offense, let it be known to your brethren; yet, He says to do it with the intentions of making peace (Matthew 18:15). Yelling, screaming, name calling, cursing, demeaning, slapping, punching, manipulation, belittling, or demanding, isn't going to bring about the right change; but instead, will most likely cause the situation to blow out of control, and destroy the relationship altogether, due to damaged emotions. For the Lord has said that it is harsh words that stir anger, and soft words that turns away wrath (Proverbs 15:1). The best way to go about it is to let your disapproval be known with a solution that can work for you both. Proverbs 14:30 says, "A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy is rottenness to the bone". When we feel the need to criticize in way that is harmful, we should be quick to repent, and ask God to guide our words as the Holy Spirit gives way; for, we all will be held accountable for every word that we have said, or even thought, but didn't say (Matthew 12:36). We are not to think highly of ourselves where we feel that we can say what we want, when we want. We must be mindful that our emotions are untrustworthy and can give us the wrong attitude, which will be damaging to ourselves because we are not being who we are in Christ, and conforming to a practice of having a critical attitude. It can be damaging to our relationships with others by planting a seed of bitterness and resentment, or burning bridges with people who we love, love us, who can be of help to us in the future. We also damage our relationship with God, who cannot commune with anyone who is unwilling to repent of acts that offend Him. Even Aaron addressed his wrongful attitude by acknowledging his act of criticizing Moses to be foolishness and sin (Numbers 12:11). A critical attitude is dishonoring, displeasing, unholy, and lacking truth in the eyesight of God. He wants our thoughts to be taken captive to obey Him, and focus only on those things that are excellent and of good report (2 Corinthians 10:5, Philippians 4:8) because we don't know all aspects of a situation as to why something is what it is, only God knows. If we find it difficult to bridle our tongue, God expects for us to ask Him for His help, and that we pray that He reveal to us other critical aspects of our attitudes that are not a part of His body, which works together for the glory of Him.
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